Precipice
by daphrose
Summary: They were both on the brink of something. She was on the brink of anger, on the brink of fear, and on the brink of desperation, all because of him. He was on the brink of a ledge, on the brink of a cliff, and approaching the brink death far quicker than he would've liked. (Bade; Beck whump)


**May I state the obvious? Beck is hot. He's also my favorite character. (For more that just his looks, I promise! Although I'm not denying that the hair's a factor. ;)) But anyway, I love to whump my favorite characters, and Beck is included. But there is a surprising lack of Beck whump in this fandom. Any whump at all, really. Trust me, I scoured through over 800 stories looking for some good ones. Mostly it's all the cliches: if it's not self-harm, it's a car accident, coma, amnesia, or occasionally cancer. Well, I thought I'd do something different than all of that. Something that even** ** _I_** **haven't done before, in fact. And I threw in lots of Bade because I love them.**

 **Geez, if I ever have to write a 20-page paper in college, I'll just remind myself of the time I wrote a 24-page Bade fic in 48 hours. I'm not kidding. I starting this Friday night and it wound up being 24 pages and over 9000 words. Holy cow! And I spent more time researching than actually writing (yaydistractions), so, yeah, I'm impressed with myself.**

 **I haven't posted on this site in six months now, and I'm posting in a new fandom. Hey Victorious fans! Hello any old fans of mine from the Lab Rats fandom! Love you! Sorry for disappearing! Again! I'm getting back into the swing of writing, and I'm so proud of what you're all about to read.**

 **WARNINGS: Severe injuries, a few mild swear words from characters I think are capable of it (read: Jade), a few borderline morbid thoughts, kissing, and Jade's general meanness. There is NO character death. Also, just a warning that this is a highly-researched and realistically executed story, so if you're here for** ** _pure_** **fluff, this isn't it.**

 **Also, this takes place in season one somewhere. More towards the beginning, I think. Post Jade Dumps Beck.**

 **I don't own Victorious or any of their characters. Bryan, Officer Rodriquez, this particular iteration of Beck's mom, and any other characters you don't recognize are mine, along with the plot. Enjoy!**

* * *

 **/\/\/\ Precipice /\/\/\**

* * *

Jade stood by the door, sipping her coffee and furrowing her brow. Each beat of her heart seemed to expand and strengthen the wall of ice currently protecting her feelings. She did not want to be hurt. Not again. She wanted to greet him and kiss him longingly and then have a standoffish conversation which he never minded except when he did. But she shoved those disgusting feelings aside and instead mentally wrote a list of excuses. Once she finished that, it would become a list of vile remarks and punishments.

The scent of off-brand vanilla shampoo filled her nostrils and deepened her scowl. "What do you want?"

"Good morning to you too," Tori said as came up behind Jade. Could she be any more annoying? "What are you doing?" Apparently she could.

Jade stared at her coffee cup. "Waiting for Beck." She didn't want to seem vulnerable. That comment didn't leave her vulnerable. Of course she was waiting for her boyfriend. She did that all the time. She didn't have to tell Tori that she'd been standing in the vicinity of the door for over an hour. She didn't have to tell Tori about their fight last night, and the fact that they barely made up, and that she wasn't sure if he was still mad at her. She didn't have to mention that. She could keep it curt, as was her style, and save her dignity.

"He's not here yet? School's about to start."

"Yeah, I know that." She said the words with plenty of bite, hoping Tori would take the hint. Unfortunately, she didn't. Jade shifted and shoved her hand under her arm, trying to look anywhere but Tori's face. Was this what having friends was like? She didn't like it.

"Well, uh, I've gotta go. But I'll see you in Sikowitz's class later!"

"Yeah, bye."

Jade took the second-to-last sip of her coffee. The bell rang.

Their fight had not been a pretty one. Beck had offered to do a "favor" for a cheerleader, and Jade didn't care that the "favor" was only to lend her a laptop charger he wasn't currently using. Cheerleaders were peppy and wore short skirts, and why on earth should Beck be associating with them? Their fight had lasted long into the evening and was only barely resolved by her begrudging acknowledgment that he had a right to talk to other people (although in her opinion, cheerleaders hardly classified as people) and by his weak admittance that he could've been a little less flirty. They had been silent for several moments before he said he'd meet her at the front doors of the school in the morning and left.

Jade took the last sip and crushed her coffee cup. The hallway cleared out, and she wondered how long she should stay before she looked desperate. If she stayed for five more minutes and Beck showed up, what would she say? She wouldn't say anything. She would just kiss him and deflect any questions about why she had waited around so long.

No. She couldn't do that. Her dignity demanded more of her. She walked over to the trash can and threw away her cup, making each movement slow and deliberate. If Beck so happened to walk in on her being fashionably late for class, so be it. She glanced back at the door. Nothing. She opened her mouth and meant to swear at Beck for his broken promise, but she didn't. She stepped forward, toward the door, and then turned and marched off to class.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Okay, so he was a dreamer. He was a contemplator. He liked working out the thoughts in his head, digging through emotions and feelings that he felt or wanted to feel. He liked taking moments to himself, away from his friends, away from his girlfriend, away from the pressure and flashiness of Hollywood. Not that he didn't love those things, of course, but everything in moderation.

He liked coming here. He liked watching the waves crash against the rocks while the sun's first light peeked out from behind him to chase away the darkness. There was an ocean in front of him, but no beach. No beach to become busy or dirty or cliche. Here were great cliffs formed by eons of pressure and beatings. Here was power, strength, and serenity far beyond the rest of his world.

He had found his place, far away from everything. A place where he could simply be.

He was a dreamer. He liked to get caught up in his thoughts when he could afford it. He allowed his mind to wander down those oft-forbidden roads. His senseless sensing ceased as he dove into new thoughts of creativity.

Okay, so he was a dreamer. He didn't always focus. His wits left in favor of pursued passion.

Okay, so . . . he was a dreamer.

He got so caught up in dreams that he missed the loose rocks. He missed how close he was to the edge.

His mind and body jolted him back to reality when he slipped, but it was too late. He'd already fallen over the cliff into the abyss below.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Jade looked for Beck after first period. She walked by his locker and around the adjoining hall where he usually hung out until his next class. She used the few points of subtlety she possessed to not look desperate.

Something was gnawing at her. It was something far more painful and infuriating than the jealousy she felt almost daily. She couldn't pinpoint the feeling yet, but she tried to squash it because she hated it.

Why was she even feeling anything at all? She and Beck fought all the time, and sometimes it lasted for days. Sometimes they iced each other out. It happened. Why was this time different?

Why . . . why had he broken such a meaningless promise to her, and why did she care?

Jade was about to give up when she saw Cat. Cat, the one who shared her first-period class with Beck. Cat, the one who was so innocent as to not presume desperation on her part. Cat, the one who was ditzy enough to forget a conversation minutes after she'd had it.

"Cat, have you seen Beck?"

"No! But I have seen Andre, Tori, and Robbie. Does that help you?"

"Not in the slightest. Beck wasn't in your class?"

She shook her head. "No, but sometimes he's not." She leaned over and whispered, "He's kind of a rebel that way."

Jade nodded her head. Of course he was. She knew that he showed up to school late sometimes. Not always, but sometimes. It happened. It might have absolutely nothing to do with her. It probably had absolutely nothing to do with her. He had shown up late on days when they were fighting and when they were not fighting, and the reasons had nothing to do with her.

Jade shook herself free of her thoughts to realize that Cat was still staring at her. "What are you waiting for? Go!" She had it harshly, and Cat ran off with a shriek.

Jade pulled out her phone and opened to Beck's name. She hadn't texted him all that morning. She'd been cooling down from their fight, and she figured he'd do the same. Neither was quite ready to push it. She hovered her fingers over the keys, trying to find words, wondering if she should.

The bell rang. She stuffed her phone in her pocket and headed to class.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

The initial impact was worse than he'd imagined. He landed at an awkward angle, with his left arm absorbing most of the force and subsequently emitting a plethora of sickening noises. His lungs disagreed with the collision and decided to stop working properly. He spent several moments gasping for air, and just as the darkness began creeping its fingers across his vision, his lungs inflated again. His nerves sent spikes of pain from various locations around his body, and his first instinct was to groan.

His vision swam. Even after oxygen had chased off the darkness, he still couldn't see or think properly. He didn't black out, but he wished he would.

Everything hurt. Some things hurt worse than others, but everything hurt.

For so many minutes he lay there, not wanting to think, definitely not wanting to move. It all hurt.

He had hair in his eyes and . . . oh. Oh, yeah. Blood on his face. Of course.

The sun had risen now, casting the glory of dawn upon the desolate world and giving him a good view of his position.

At least he had fallen on a ledge. He hadn't fallen into the water (a certain, horrifying death), and he would not have to prop himself up at an awkward angle until someone could rescue him. He had space to lay down and rest with a few inches on each side of his body.

He couldn't bring himself to sit up and look. He couldn't bring himself to find some kind of way out just yet. Just yet.

He . . . couldn't . . . think . . .

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Jade stabbed at her salad so hard she poked through the styrofoam container. Sinjin sat down across from her and opened his mouth to speak, but she sent the most jaw-dropping death glare she could muster, and the boy scurried off without a sound. She would've smirked and been proud of her glare—it had been a good one—but she couldn't bring herself to be.

What _were_ her feelings for Beck? Was it healthy to think about another person this much? Was it dangerous to worry so much about a trivial promise made and broken after such a heated argument?

She stabbed her salad again, but she didn't eat.

"Hey, Jade," Tori said as she walked up. She had some apprehension in her voice, as well she should. Jade was glowering more than usual today. "All alone?"

"I like to be alone. It gives me a chance to watch how miserable everyone else is." She looked around the cafeteria to make her point.

"Well, can I sit?"

Jade looked up at Tori. For all that was dark and foreboding in the world, she couldn't figure out what was going on with this girl. She acted far nicer than she should—nicer than anyone else in her place would, to be sure. Jade didn't like it whatsoever, but she begrudgingly respected it. She shrugged. "I guess I can't stop you."

Jade probably should've stopped her, because before she knew it all the rest of the little popular pack showed up. Cat and Robbie were arguing about the color of the sky (no, she was not making that up), and Andre began venting his frustration to Tori over his latest musical assignment. Jade frowned at her salad and punctured a cherry tomato with her fingernail.

"So, Jade, where's Beck?" Andre asked after a few minutes.

"What do I look like, his mother?" Jade snapped.

"All right, all right, it's cool. I was just asking."

"Yeah, Beck wasn't in Sikowitz's class earlier," Tori said.

"Really?" Jade said with a sneer. "Thanks for the update."

Cat poked Jade's shoulder. "Why are you so ticked off?"

"I'm always ticked off. And stop poking me!"

Robbie had his phone out. "According to The Slap dot com, he hasn't updated his profile all morning."

Everyone looked at Jade. She tried to ignore it and deepened her scowl to scare them off, but it didn't work. Why had she gotten closer to these people again?

"Why should I know where he is? Just because we're dating means I have to keep tabs on him 24/7?"

"That does sound like something you'd do," Andre said.

"Well, it's not. And . . . and I don't care where he is. He's probably off doing . . . something . . . stupid." Her eyes narrowed. She hated the way her insults fell flat when it came to Beck.

"Okay, we were just wondering if you knew anything, that's all," Tori said. "I've never seen him miss this much school before."

"And how would you know how much school he's missed before?"  
"Because I go to school with him!"

"I—" Jade swallowed and stood. "I don't want to sit with you losers anyway." She stormed over to the trashcan, nearly barreling over some poor freshman. She threw away almost as much salad as she'd bought and marched into the school.

The janitor's closet had always been a safe haven for Jade. She went in and scoured the corners to make sure the janitor wasn't hiding in them (again), and once she was sure she was alone, she took out her phone.

 _Alright, I'm done w/ ur game. Where r u? - Jade_

She sat down on the floor and tried to decide what to do. Lunch period had only started a few minutes ago, so she had quite a bit of time to kill before her next class. She pulled out some homework from her Advanced Acting class. She ran over some lines from a short skit they would be performing the next day. She played with her tones and facial expressions to portray as many emotions as she could, but somehow they always devolved into anger. She checked her phone every few seconds, but Beck hadn't responded. He hadn't even read the text.

 _Really?! - Jade_

 _U think ur so cool playing hooky, huh? Where. R. U. - Jade_

Half an hour passed while Jade continued to rehearse and stare at her three texts (the most her dignity would allow), and the hallways outside got busy. The bell would ring soon.

At some point she had to swallow her pride.

She dialed his number.

One ring. Two rings. Three. Four. Then her own voice came on the line.

"You've reached Beck Oliver's phone. If you want to leave a message about how hot he is, don't even think about it!"

 _Beep_.

"Beck. Hi. Look, I'm sorry about our stupid fight and whatever, but everyone's looking for you. You've missed half the school day. Seriously, what are you doing? So help me, if I find out you're riding around the town with some girl, she's gonna lose both her eyes!" Jade sighed, but she made sure to do it away from the speaker. She truly did trust Beck not to go gallivanting about with other girls, but she wasn't about to admit that. "Dude, just . . . call me. Or Andre, or something. I don't care, just . . . tell someone where you are so everyone will stop asking me. Bye."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

 _"911, what's your emergency?"_

At no point in his life had he _wanted_ to hear those words, yet at this moment, he wanted nothing more. He had already grown tired of the waves—almost—maybe soon. He wanted to hear a human voice that would reassure him that everything would be okay.

But he couldn't have that. He couldn't call 911. He couldn't call his mom. He couldn't call his girlfriend. His phone sat in the front seat of his car, utterly useless. That was the last time he gave up technology so he could "enjoy nature." Well, it could be the last time anyway. . . .

He hadn't brought himself to sit up yet. It all still hurt too much. But he did have a surprisingly good view of his current position. Sheer rock towered above him on the right. The only other nearby ledges were too small for even birds to nest in. Even if he could bring his aching body into an upright position, it would do no good. He would not get out of this situation on his own.

"Hey! Can anybody hear me? Help!" he called out from time to time. His lungs rather disagreed with these attempts at rescue, and each time he wound up in a coughing fit, fighting off the darkness.

Oof, his chest hurt. It hurt to breathe. That couldn't be a good thing. Broken ribs? Maybe? Maybe something more serious? Anatomy was not his strong suit, and his first aid training was negligible. He couldn't say how bad he was. He'd hit the rock hard.

His head hurt less. That was good. His arm hurt more. That wasn't so good.

He'd broken his arm. He knew that much. He didn't where or how badly, but he'd broken it. He'd probably sprained an ankle, too.

Blood seeped out from a wound in front of his left ear. The flow seemed to be slowing . . . a bit. He couldn't find a way to staunch it. His left hand was of no use so long as it was connected to his left arm, and any attempt to use his right hand to wipe at his face caused him to roll ever so slightly onto his left shoulder, which sent more waves of pain through everything.

He tried hard not to panic. He tried not to think about the possibility of never getting down. He tried to exclude all those negative, terrifying, realistic thoughts from his brain. He could always find a way to keep a level head in tough situations, and he couldn't forsake that now.

Maybe he could use this. It was . . . research. Yeah, research. Four years from now he would star in a spy movie where his character gets stuck on a cliff, and he could use his current emotions to drive those scenes.

Or not, since he shoved all current emotions aside in favor of blank acceptance. Every time he let himself feel anything about his situation, it was such an overwhelming fear that he wanted to thrash and scream, both of which could only result in immense pain and a vicious cycle.

He tried to take deep breaths. He thought he read somewhere that taking deep breaths is good to do when you have broken ribs, even if it hurts. Boy, did it hurt. Hopefully what he read was right.

Man, he was hungry.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

 _Screw u. - Jade_

 _Screw u and ur ancestors. - Jade_

 _Screw u 6 ways from Sunday - Jade_

Maybe she felt a tiny bit guilty, but it had been hours and Beck hadn't responded to a thing. She would find a way to rile him up, or make him worried, or anything. She just wanted to talk to him.

"Hey, Beck. If you're sick, just say so. And if you're not, what the hell is going on? You missed an entire day of school. You've never done that. So what's so important, huh? What's more important than me?" She pulled the phone away from her face and yelled, "Call! Me! Now!"

When she finished leaving the voicemail, Jade opened The Slap on her phone and posted a status that read, "I'm looking for a boyfriend. Must be a good actor, lanky, have perfect hair, and RESPOND TO MY MESSAGES! Feeling: Teed off." She hit post and kicked a nearby locker.

This had never happened, and Jade didn't know how to feel. Even when Beck got mad at her, he still read her messages. He did a passive-aggressive thing where he let her know he'd seen it and then didn't respond. She was used to that from time to time. This was different. Either he didn't have his phone with him, or he was purposefully ignoring her. She didn't favor either prospect.

She had given way to desperation now. She loved Beck, and she wanted to be with Beck, and she wanted Beck to be with her. Why wasn't Beck with her?

"Hey, Jade," Tori said as she came up. Again? Three encounters with Tori were far too many in a day for Jade. "Do you think something happened to Beck?"

"Like you really care," Jade snorted.

"I do, because unlike you, I actually have human feelings."

Jade made a face, but she let it slip a little. Tori had been kind to her in the past. She'd helped get her and Beck back together when she'd stupidly broken it off, and if Tori could see her at her lowest then, maybe it wouldn't be the worst thing to open up to her now.

"I don't know what's up with Beck," she said in a slightly conversational tone. "I've been texting him and calling him, but he won't respond."

"Maybe he had a family emergency come up. Or he got sick. Or he broke his phone, or . . ." Tori trailed off, her excuses running dry.

Jade stayed quiet, playing with her bracelet and glancing around the school. Most people had left, and the rest were leaving. Some couples walked out hand-in-hand, and it made Jade sick.

"Are you mad at him about something?" Tori asked.

"I . . ." She snapped her bracelet and felt the satisfying sting against her skin. "We fought last night. We kinda made up and he said he'd meet me here this morning, but he never showed up."

Understanding flashed in Tori's eyes.

"I don't know if he's avoiding me because he's mad at me, or if he's just being a prick . . . I don't know." She scowled. "And if there's one thing I hate more than anything else, it's not knowing. About . . . about Beck, I mean."

"Aw, you care about him!"

"Of course I care. I'm dating him, aren't I?" Jade bit her lip. "I don't know what to do."

"Well . . . maybe he is mad at you—"

"Watch what you say next or I'll cut out your tongue."

Tori pursed her lips. "What I was gonna say is, maybe I should try calling him. Maybe he'll answer me."

"What are you implying?" Jade rounded on her with nostrils flared.

"Nothing! Just, if he _is_ ignoring you, then maybe he won't ignore a friend." Tori could still see the anger in Jade's eyes, so she added, " _Just_ a friend."

Jade relented, and Tori took out her phone. She stood there for a few moments, and Jade could hear the ringing up until it stopped. Tori scrunched up her face and mouthed, 'Is that you?' Then she said, "Hey, hey, hey, Beck, it's Tori! Listen, I was just calling to find out how you're doing. We're all a little worried about you missing school with no warning. So just, call me back once you get the chance. I'm sure there's a completely reasonable explanation as to why you're off the grid, but it would still be nice to know you're okay." Tori caught Jade's glare and said, "For us _all_ to know you're okay. So, yeah, call me back. Bye." She ended the call and said to Jade, "Sorry, no luck."

"I noticed." But her words didn't have much bite this time.

"I'll text him, too," Tori said. "'Hey, Beck, just left you a message. Where are you?' I'll let you know if he responds."

"Thanks," Jade said. She wanted to make it a little less sincere, but she couldn't. She did feel genuine gratefulness to Tori. Crap, now she owed her one.

"Has he ever been like this before?" Tori asked.

"Not since I've known him. I mean, he wanders off and skips classes sometimes, but he's never . . . disappeared."

"Do you think he's all right?"

Of course he was. He was Beck. He was always fine. He was her rock. He stayed calm when she flipped out. He held her tight when she couldn't sit still. He loved her when she was going too crazy to love. How could he be anything other than perfectly perfect? "Yeah. I'm sure he's just being an ass."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Forget food. He wanted water. The waves hundreds of feet below mocked him with every lash on the rocks. He felt so thirsty. His mouth was dry and his head was starting to hurt.

"Hey! Help!" But his weak voice drifted into the wind and went nowhere. He had loved this place for its seclusion, but now he despised it for that same reason.

The sun above his head was hot: understatement of the year. No, it was not a ridiculously warm day, but the wind didn't come across his ledge much and no clouds covered the blazing ball above. He felt far too hot and far too uncomfortable.

Part of the problem lay with his clothing. He had dressed for a frigid early morning on the coast, and now his jean jacket clung to his skin with his sweat as an adhesive. He wanted nothing more in the world (other than water, a 911 operator, and a hamburger) than to rip it off.

He'd tried, once. He'd pulled himself up a bit and began to wiggle his right arm out of its sleeve, hoping to free his left arm afterward. These little actions sent shockwaves of pain so jolting that he fell back onto the rock and lay paralyzed in pain.

So he had to lay there in his hot, sweaty, uncomfortable jacket.

He might die up here. He might die on this rock, and no one would ever know. Nobody was looking for him. He was not near civilization. Unless some hapless hiker wandered onto the trail above, he would never get off of this damn rock.

He wanted to cry, and he would've, if he wasn't so worried about losing more water. He might not be a first aid expert, but even he knew the dangers of dehydration.

He couldn't give up yet. He couldn't give in. He couldn't give in to despair or fear or anything else, because then he would certainly never go home.

He closed his eyes and prayed to whatever deity would listen.

He heard the seagulls cawing above his head.

He fell asleep.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Jade fell into bed and spread her hair out on the pillow. She stared at the ceiling with her eyebrows furrowed and her mouth slightly agape.

She knew she didn't deserve Beck. Of course she knew that. She wasn't oblivious. That's why she got so jealous of him. Beck could have his pick of whatever girl he wanted, and he chose _her_. Nothing else in the world meant so much to her than to be chosen and loved. She knew he could date hotter girls, smarter girls, friendly girls, but he didn't. He dated her.

Not that she thought she lacked those qualities. Jade possessed many interesting traits, but low self-esteem was hardly one of them. She did think highly of herself, for good reason. However, in the eyes of Beck and others, some girls looked better, talked better, and maybe even loved better. That was where Jade felt inferior, even if she denied it.

Take Tori Vega. Sweeter, gentler, friendly, but still enough bite to make her interesting. Never had Jade seen such a promising rival for Beck's affection. He wrote so many girls off as shallow and weak, but Tori was neither of those things. Plus, her appearance wasn't completely tragic, Jade supposed.

So, yes, Jade was jealous for the thing she didn't deserve. She had every right to be, and she dreaded the day when she woke up to find that the most special thing in her life was hers no longer.

She loved their late night talks when she said things that only he understood. She loved the way he kissed her with such passion, like he never wanted to stop for a breath. She loved the way he held her in his arms so that she felt safe and secure. She loved the quiet nights they spent in his RV. She loved laying on his chest, listening to his strong, steady heartbeat while she ran her hands through his hair and he rubbed his thumb along her shoulder.

Had she lost him? Had she said something that made him want to leave her? Had she driven him to something, anything that she shouldn't have?

She pulled out her phone for one more text before she went to sleep.

 _Sorry. I love you. - Jade_

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

He woke up to darkness. Complete darkness. He'd never seen anything like it. He could barely make out the rock wall on his right, and his feet were lost to his eyes. It was a new moon, and only the astronomically distant stars gave any light to the world. There were many of them, but they were pinpricks in a black sheet, not the glistening-bright-as-day beams they were in movies.

He found a way to maneuver his right hand behind his head for support. He shifted and stretched his legs to work out the cramps. Yes, it hurt, but it was going to hurt anyway. He'd accepted that by now.

He'd been here for far more than twelve hours. He'd been in the same position, fighting off the pain and the fear, for more than half a day. No one would find him at least until the morning. And would they find him in the morning? How much longer could he really last?

Man, his head hurt. It was different from the pinching, stabbing pain of his injuries. His head ached and radiated the aching. He didn't like it at all. He didn't like any of this.

He was trying so hard not to be afraid. He didn't want to be afraid. He knew it wouldn't help. He hated being afraid. He never really was, not because few things scared him, but because he controlled himself. Because he shoved it all away. Because he could keep his reactions steady and his mind calm. Because he . . . because he . . . b-because . . .

Oh, he felt like he was going to throw up. He didn't know how he could feel that way, considering there was nothing left inside him, but he did. The nausea would've knocked him off his feet if he'd been on them. It passed as quickly as it came, another unexplained symptom from who-knows-what.

He felt so weak and small. For the first time in his life, he didn't feel power or strength or control. Not even in the smallest bit. He felt like he would never stand up again, could never stand up again. He felt . . . he felt tired. He . . . felt . . . so . . . tired.

He couldn't . . . he couldn't . . .

But what else could he do?

He . . . went . . . to . . . sleep.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Jade stood in the same place, with the same coffee, at the same time, with the same look. No way Beck would blow off two days of school in a row. She kept her eyes trained on the door, never once getting distracted. She didn't care what people thought today. Let them call her desperate. She only wanted to hold her boyfriend and kiss him and run her hands through his hair and know that he was okay. That last one was most important, but she didn't want to admit it.

The bell rang. She stayed put. Everyone scurried off to class. Five minutes passed. Ten. Fifteen. At the half-hour mark, Jade marched out of the school.

She drove straight to Beck's house and knocked on the front door. Mrs. Oliver answered, holding several different toiletry items in her hands. "Oh, uh, hello, Jade," she said, her voice strained and slightly annoyed.

"Where's Beck?"

"Uh, I don't know, at school, I suppose. Listen, dear, it's . . . uh, good to see you, but I'm literally about to head out the door. I'm going to be late for my flight. I've got an extremely important business trip in Seattle and I can't be late."

"Beck didn't show up at school yesterday."

"Oh, he didn't?"

"Didn't the school call you?"

"Maybe . . . it rang a few times, but I didn't answer it. Beck's dad is back in Canada and I'm all alone. Look, I'm sorry, Jade. Feel free to see if he's in the RV. Where's my phone? Oh, there." She knelt down by a suitcase and threw in the toiletries, and then she looked at her watch. "I'll have to hope there's a Target near my hotel. Um, I'm sure Beck's fine, Jade. He's always off doing his own thing." She led Jade out the door. "Go search his RV, and try calling him. I know I heard him drive off yesterday morning, but everything after that's been a blur. Ah! I really need to go. Goodbye, Jade!"

Jade didn't even have time to respond as Mrs. Oliver threw her suitcase in the trunk of her car and drove off. She rolled her eyes and headed over to the RV. She'd hoped for once to get something useful out of Beck's mom, but she should've known better.

Beck's car was gone, which likely meant he was gone too. Nonetheless, Jade went up to the RV door and pounded on it. She pulled on the handle to find it locked, but it didn't take much time for her to break it. She climbed up into the cozy little room where Beck spent his life. She looked around, hoping for clues. Maybe he'd left his phone behind.

She called him and listened intently. No ringing. And yes, Beck kept his phone on silent sometimes, but she didn't hear the characteristic buzz of a silenced phone resting on another object.

"You've reached Beck Oliver's phone. . . ."

Never had she been so annoyed to hear her own voice.

"Hey, I'm in your RV. Thinking about trashing it while I'm here. Wanna come stop me, pretty boy?" She paused, almost expecting him to answer, and then she hung up. After a brief moment of consideration, she pulled up Cat's number on her phone.

 _Is Beck in class today? - Jade_

 _noooooooo :( :( :( - Cat_

 _ms moore isnt happy :( :( :( noone knows where he is :( :( :( - Cat_

 _hes never missed 2 days b4 where is he? :( :( :( - Cat_

That settled that. Jade marched back out to her car. She knew all of Beck's favorite places to hang out. She could drive around, ask anybody if they'd seen him. She had to find him. Something bigger than their fight was occurring, and Jade didn't like it one bit.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

He felt worse in the morning. The blood had caked on his face, and the sweat from the day before had left him sticky all over. By contrast, the cold night had stiffened every muscle in his body and left his skin tingling. He was grateful for the sun peeking out on the world, even if it would likely become a mortal enemy again by noon.

His arm hurt. His left ankle had begun to throb, exacerbated by a feverish sleep. His breaths were coming shorter now, and his chest hurt so much worse. He couldn't bring himself to take a deep breath, and he seriously doubted his ability to call for help. His heart raced in his chest, but it felt oddly ineffective. His head swam, and his headache had deepened.

Still, he couldn't be afraid. Not yet. Not really. He wasn't going to die afraid. He was . . . going to die . . . alone. Alone and cold and hot and hurting and he would never get to kiss her again and he hated it.

The world swam around him. The sun's light began to fade. He had to stay awake. It was daylight now. Someone would find him now. S-Someone . . . a-anyone . . . c-could they hear him?

No . . .

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

No luck. None. Nothing.

Nobody had seen Beck in at least two days. He wasn't at any of his favorite places. He wasn't anywhere.

Jade slammed her forehead into the steering wheel, gritting her teeth to fight back the tears. What did she do? Did she call the police? Could they even get involved if the only thing she could say was that a known rebel was playing hooky and not answering his needy girlfriend?

Tears began to roll down her cheeks. She hated crying, but she hated missing him more. Where was he?

She'd texted her . . . ahem . . . "friends" several times that morning. Third period had begun several minutes ago, and still Beck was absent. Something was going on, and Jade was getting so, so scared.

She took a deep breath and focused. Where else could Beck be? Any place that he loved, that he would spend lots of time at, that he could get lost in?

After a few seconds, one such place struck her. It was a place Beck had shown her once a few months ago: a secluded peninsula out on the ocean where apparently he liked to go and collect his thoughts. She immediately dismissed the idea, of course. The peninsula was over an hour and a half away, and she couldn't go all the way there on a random hunch.

Then again . . . she didn't have anything else to go on. She groaned, sniffed, buckled her seatbelt, and drove west.

After an hour and a half, Jade pulled over to the side of the road and got out. She was going mostly by memory on this, but she was fairly certain she was in the right spot. She walked off the road and along the dusty path that led to the ocean.

Yes, this was it. Jade wasn't one for views, but she had to admit that this was a fine one. The peninsula stuck out nearly a hundred feet into the ocean, and the waves slapped against the rocks far below. It gave Jade a sense of power to be so high, so high above the mighty Pacific Ocean and all its dangers. Yeah, it was an okay view.

But no Beck.

Jade clenched her fist and snarled. "I can't believe I drove all the way out here for this." She walked up the edge and looked out. She spun around, hoping to catch sight of anything. She saw footprints in the sand between the rocks, but those could belong to anyone.

Then it struck her that she hadn't seen his car. She hadn't seen his car parked on the road. He wasn't here.

Jade felt something welling up in her chest. It was something even greater than anger or sadness or fear, but she couldn't describe it any better than that. It welled up and up and up until she screamed into the wind, "Where are you, Beck Oliver?"

She folded her arms and bowed her head. The tears had begun to flow freely now. She'd forgotten about the cheerleader and the laptop charger and their angry words and his stupid broken promise. All she wanted was him. All she wanted was to see him, hear him, hold him, love him. Was it too much to ask?

"-de?"

She jerked her head up, her heart beating faster. No, she was crazy. It had been the wind. She was hallucinating because her brain wanted so bad to have him back. But her heart wanted him back too, so she called out, "Beck?" Then louder: "Beck!"

"Jade."

There it was again. Soft, strained, and almost . . . pitiful? Jade spun around, eyes darting to every bush and every rock. Where? Where? Then it hit her like a wrecking ball to the stomach. She leaned over the edge of the cliff and caught sight of his jean jacket and shaggy brown hair. The gasp caught in her throat and almost choked her.

"Beck! What are you doing down there?"

"Oh, you know . . . just chillin'." He flashed what she supposed was meant to be a smile but appeared to be more along the lines of a grimace. "I . . . I'm probably hallucinating right now, . . . but it's making me happy so . . . so I'm fine with it."

"No, no, no, you're not hallucinating, and neither am I. I . . . I'm here Beck." Jade swallowed back the tears. She couldn't break now. Now was the most important time to be strong. She could see the blood on his face from here. She could see his arm hanging limply at his side. She could see the sweat shining on his forehead. Her mind raced with what to do. "You're hurt."

"Uh-huh." His voice sounded so wrong, like he couldn't get enough force behind his words. But he had to, because Jade was thirty feet above him and she needed to hear him in order to help.

"How long have you been down there?"

"Since yesterday morning."

She squeezed her eyes shut. She had been hoping that wasn't the case. "Why didn't you call someone?"

"Phone's back in the car."

"Okay . . . okay. I'm going to call for help. Don't worry, we'll get you out of there." Jade pulled out her phone and dialed 911. She never had before, and truth be told, she'd been hoping she would never need to.

"911, what's your—"

Jade didn't even let her finish before blurting out, "My boyfriend's stuck on the side of a cliff!"

"All right, miss, calm down. I need you to tell me exactly what happened."

"I . . . I don't really know exactly what happened. He was walking on this peninsula yesterday morning, and I guess he fell. He's stuck on a ledge about thirty feet down. He's badly injured."

"I see. He's been down there since yesterday morning?"

"Yeah. I just found him."

"Is he conscious?"

Jade leaned over the edge to check again, and Beck flashed her a wry grin. "Yeah, but he doesn't look good."

"And he is breathing?"

Jade leaned over and yelled, "Are you breathing?" She meant it to be something of a joke.

Beck's smile faltered, and he made a so-so gesture with his right hand. Jade felt like someone had dumped a bucket of ice down the front of her shirt.

"Yeah, but . . . I don't think he's breathing well."

"About how old is he?"

"Sixteen."

"Okay, honey, I'll—"

"My name is Jade." She didn't like being called honey.

"Okay, Jade. You said he's stuck on the side of the cliff?"  
"Yeah."

"And you can't reach him at all, and he can't climb out?"  
"No. It's a steep cliff."

"Okay, Jade, here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to call in a search and rescue team with a helicopter to get him out of there. But in order to do that, I need you to tell me exactly where you are. Do you know where you are?"

Jade put a hand on her forehead. "Uh . . . no, not really. We're . . . on the ocean?"

"Are there any major roads in the area?"

"Yes! The one I parked on, but I don't remember what it's called."

"I'm going to need you to find out before I send help."

"Okay." Jade sighed and looked down at Beck again. She didn't want to leave him, but she also wanted him to be okay. "Beck, I'm going to go back to the road and find out where we are. I'll be back with help soon."

He opened his mouth, probably to make an "I'm not going anywhere" joke, but he closed it again and merely smiled at her. Man, how she wanted to hold him and kiss every wound and make this all go away forever.

Jade headed out to the road and spotted the sign. She told it to the dispatcher and then looked at her car's GPS to find the nearest cross street.

"Perfect. Thank you, Jade. I've already alerted search and rescue, as well as the local police. They should be there in a few minutes. I want you to wait with your car until they get there so you can show them the situation. What does your car look like?"

Jade described it, her face warming a little when she realized she wouldn't get to go back to Beck just yet.

After getting a few more relevant facts about Beck's situation, the dispatcher hung up and Jade was left alone. Admittedly, Jade had been grateful for her calming attitude. It was her job, she supposed.

A fire truck pulled up first, and two squad cars came right behind it.

"Are you Jade?" one of the officers asked.

"Yeah." She didn't like this. She was used to questioning authority and holding her ground, but she couldn't do that here. She couldn't do that when each man and woman around her could save Beck's life, _wanted_ to save his life. She choked back the tears. No faltering this time.

"Where is he?"

She led a handful of firefighters and officers out to the peninsula. One of the firefighters knelt down at the edge of the cliff and tried to converse with Beck about his situation, but he cut it off once he realized that Beck was having trouble answering.

The officer who'd first approached Jade turned to her now and asked, "So you just found him a few minutes ago?"

"Yeah. He's been missing since yesterday."

"So he's been stuck down there that whole time?"

"I guess so. He said he left his phone in the car. I've been texting him and calling him all day, but I guess he—" She couldn't swallow around the lump in her throat anymore. She kept blinking and running her hands through her hair and wishing it was Beck's hair instead of hers.

"Hey, it's going to be fine," the officer said. "I've worked with these search and rescue guys before. They know what they're doing. Trust me, in a few minutes he'll back on the ground and be perfectly safe. He's going to be fine."

"You can't promise that."

The officer chuckled. "Maybe. But I can't promise he won't be fine either."

Jade shrugged. "Uh, thanks, I guess."

"Of course. He's lucky to have a girl who cares about him like you do." He paused for a moment, then said, "I'm Officer Rodriquez, by the way."

"Jade West," she mumbled. "But don't look me up in your database."

The sound of chopper blades slicing the air grew closer, and the officers and firefighters waved their arms and pointed down to Beck's position. Officer Rodriquez placed a gentle hand on Jade's shoulder and shouted above the din, "I'm going to take you back to the road now!"

"No! I'm not going to leave him!"

"Trust me, there's nothing you can do for him here! It's too unsafe for you!"

Jade wanted to protest, but the wind from the helicopter kicked sand into her face and blinded her. Reluctantly, she followed Officer Rodriquez to the road. She glanced over her shoulder for one more look at that damned peninsula, because she never wanted to see it again in her life.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

The whole thing felt like a dream to him, and he still wasn't convinced he was awake. He watched the helicopter come into view and descend above him. He had to admit, it was a little exciting. He just . . . wanted . . . a drink . . . and sleep.

Someone in several layers of climbing gear rappelled from the helicopter and landed by Beck's feet. The man smiled at him and walked right along the edge of the ledge until he knelt down at Beck's side. "Hey, kid. My name's Bryan, and I'm here to help you. What's your name?"

"Beck."

Bryan's grin got wider. "That's a neat name. Okay, Beck, I'm going to get you back to solid ground, but before I do that, I'm going to ask a few questions and check you over. I want to make sure we don't injure you any further. Is that okay?"

"Yeah." What were his alternatives, anyway?

"All right, first and most importantly, are you having any trouble breathing?"

"Yeah, kinda. I . . . I think I broke something. It . . . it hurts all around here." He indicated the left side of his chest.

"Is it hard to take deep breaths?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. I can hear it in your voice that you're feeling short of breath. Is that correct?"

"Uh-huh."

"Okay. Unfortunately, there's not a lot I can do for you right here, but if your breathing gets any worse, tell me immediately, okay?"

"Okay."

"Good. All right, next, I know this sounds stupid, but can you wiggle your toes?"

Beck smiled and did so.

"Good. I know it seems silly, but that helps me to know that you're not paralyzed." Bryan looked up at the cliff above them and whistled. "You fell from up there?"

"Yeah."

"You're a little survivor, huh? Do you remember how you landed when you fell?"

"Mostly on my side, I think."

"That's good. I know it sounds like it should be bad, but I'd be more concerned if you'd landed on your back or your front. I'm going to give you a quick trauma assessment, but before I do, where else are you hurt?"

Beck's addled brain searched to remember what actually hurt. He'd gone so long and so numb that he had to think before he answered. "My arm . . . that one . . . I landed on it. My left ankle feels twisted or something and . . . my chest hurts. Oh, and my face."

"Is that all?"

"I have a headache, but that's not from the fall, so I don't think . . . it's important."

Bryan pursed his lips. "I beg to differ. You fell yesterday morning?"

"At sunrise."

"And you don't have water or anything down here?"

"No . . . I-I'm really thirsty, actually."

"Don't worry, we'll get you plenty of water in a few minutes. I'm going to assess you now. Let me know if anything I touch hurts, okay?"

"Okay."

Bryan began to run his hands over Beck's body, tapping and pushing to see what was wrong. Of course Beck hissed when he got to his chest. Bryan loosened his grip and said, "Can you take a few deep breaths for me?"

He obeyed, and Bryan didn't look pleased, but he didn't say anything else.

Bryan kept going. Beck's right side seemed virtually unaffected, but everything on his left side hurt. Even the lightest touch of Bryan's fingers on his left arm made him scream. Bryan finished up and smiled at him.

"I'm going to call my buddy Aiden down, and we're going to strap you to a board and bring you to land now. Hang tight."

Bryan stood and swung backward a bit while keeping his feet planted on the edge. He tapped his helmet and radioed up something Beck didn't understand. He could see another man in similar gear coming down from the helicopter.

"So," Bryan said, "other than everything that hurts, how are you feeling?"

Beck let out a soft, awkward chuckle. "Kinda embarrassed, actually."

Bryan raised his eyebrows. "Really."

"Yeah. Like . . . like I'm wasting your time."

"Saving a life is never a waste of time."

"Yeah, but . . . I shouldn't . . . be here anyway."

"Hey, you're keeping me in business." Bryan grinned and swayed side to side. Beck watched in amazement.

"You're not scared right now?"

Bryan frowned and stared at the water directly below him. His frown quickly dissipated and he laughed. "I've been doing this job for twenty years. I'm not afraid. You're the one who should be scared. Although, I'm glad you're not. Makes it easier on both of us."

Aiden had come down with the board now. Together they worked to strap Beck in. Bryan instructed him not to move, and the helicopter started to get closer. Once they got inside, Bryan shouted to the pilot, "Stay low! Patient might have a pneumothorax, and I don't want to make it worse."

The flight wasn't long. They touched down on the road, which the police had blocked off to allow them room. The paramedics on the ground lifted him up onto the cot, and the first word out of his mouth was "Jade." He could see her, standing over by a police officer, her eyes wide and her arms folded as if to protect herself.

"Sir, we—"

"No, Jade."

Everyone could see them looking at each other. The female paramedic looked at her partner. "I . . . I'll see what they found out about him. Go start an IV." She motioned for Jade to come over before pointing at Beck and saying, "Don't hurt yourself more." She walked over to converse with Bryan, and Jade ran up to him.

She didn't even say anything. He didn't even say anything. She leaned over and kissed him on the lips, gently at first, but when he responded in kind, it got deeper and stronger. It was enough to make up for the thirty-six missing hours and then some. She pulled away, her expression unreadable, even for Beck.

"Don't. Ever. Do that. Again."

"Don't plan on it."

"I hate you so much right now. How could you do this to me?"

"So it's my fault?"

"I . . . I was so scared. You . . . you idiot." He could see the tears shining in her eyes. "I hate you."

He smiled and reached his right hand up to her cheek as a mischievous idea struck him. He let his hand fall, his eyes close, and his head loll.

"Beck? Beck!"

He didn't give her time to alert the paramedics or to slap him. He grabbed the edge of her shirt and pulled her down for another kiss. Once their lips came apart, he whispered, "You love me."

"No . . . no, I distinctly said I hate you."

"You hate a lot of things." He took the deepest breath his lungs would allow. "You hate pink. You hate ducks. You . . . hate me being hurt, but—"

She interrupted him with another kiss. She ran her fingers through his dirty, sweaty, tousled hair and whispered, "I love you, idiot." She kissed him again.

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Jade leaned onto his chest, gently, carefully, and he patted her back. His breathing came out ragged and stiff, and his heart raced and jumped beneath her ear. No strength. No steadiness. It wasn't right. She wanted to cry. She loved him. She'd almost lost him.

The paramedics had to break up them up eventually. Jade watched them load him the ambulance, mask over his mouth and needles full of medication in his arm. He waved at her with his good hand, and she waved back.

Yes, she loved him. She loved him than she could even admit to herself. No, she didn't hate him. No matter how hard she tried, she never could.

They argued. They fought. That was real life, and Jade had long ago learned that real life would beat you up every chance it got. At least Beck made it better. He made it bearable, but he also made it worth living, at least for her. If it was unhealthy, she didn't want to be healthy. She didn't care. She loved him.

Which was why she walked off in search of his car and his phone so she could delete some specific messages he'd received the day before.

* * *

 **Aww. (Ohheylookcompetentadults.)**

 **Hopefully nobody was OOC. I struggled with Tori a bit. Beck was a little hard to write simply because I'm not entirely sure how he would react in a situation like that. Jade I think is perfectly capable of displaying love and worry at certain times. Putting characters in life-or-death situations like this is always an interesting stretch on their personalities, especially with a sitcom like Victorious. Hopefully I pulled it off well.**

 **Okay, so . . . I do have an idea for a sequel one-shot. Beck in the hospital, maybe some more interaction with the others, and a LOT more Bade fluffiness. I know this one-shot didn't have a lot of them together, and I think I could do more of that in a continuation. The only thing is, I don't know if anyone would read it, and I'm not sure if I care enough about it to put in the work for no one to read it. Are sequel one-shots cliche and unnecessary? Or would you like to see one for this story? Do you have ideas or suggestions for things you would want to see in a continuation? If you can answer any of these questions, leave a review below.**

 **Before I go, I just want to say a quick, genuine thank you to search and rescue people everywhere. As I said above, I did a ridiculous amount of research on this story, and I learned a great deal about what search and rescue people do. It's mind blowing. These people risk their lives to save others, and they don't even get praise most of the time. So, let's all give a round of applause for them! They deserve it!**

 **Reviews are very much appreciated but not required. Tell me what you liked, what you didn't like, whether or not you cried and/or screamed at Jade "He's over the cliff, you idiot!" And if you have thoughts/suggestions on a sequel, let me know. Thanks for reading that monster of a one-shot! Hope you liked it!**

 **~Rosie**


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